Jack Lombardi of meetpositives.com (MP) has recently issued some useful tips and guidelines in having the proper “talk” about someone's herpes diagnosis.
“Generally, dating itself is not an easy feat to accomplish. Moreover, having a sexually transmitted infection (STI) and the fact that you need to disclose it before becoming too intimate with someone is even more difficult and stressful,” says Lombardi.
According to the World Health Organization (WHO), approximately 1 million STIs such as herpes are acquired every day worldwide. Most of the time, people transmit diseases without them knowing it. Sometimes, these infections can be very hard to detect and pathogens can remain dormant for long periods of time without manifesting any of its symptoms at all. However, if someone becomes aware of their reactive status, they must deal with the issue the soonest. “If you truly care about your significant other, you need to talk about herpes and STIs and be straightforward about it,” he added.
Basically, do not overthink for it complicates the situation even more. “When you feel like it’s the right time, be sincere yet casual about it. If people truly care about you, they will listen. If they don’t, let them leave. Always remember that you have the disease but it doesn’t define you as a person,” says Lombardi.
Dating with herpes or any other STI might seem difficult to accomplish but actually, it’s not. In fact, someone’s diagnosis should not be an issue for it only adds up to the equation. Open communication, honesty and loyalty are some of the most important things in making a relationship long-lasting, fruitful and successful - even for perfectly healthy couples. “Before having the “talk”, ensure that you are well-prepared to answer all possible questions. The more prepared you are, the easier it is going to be. Be empathetic and put yourself in your partner’s shoes. Try to understand each other and have a thorough and calm conversation about it,” Lombardi added. However, it is someone’s right not to disclose how they contracted the disease for some things are better left in the past. Do not over complicate things by discussing irrelevant matters that will not benefit the conversation.
Lastly, give each other some space after having the “talk”. After all, this medical diagnosis could have a huge impact on someone else’s life. One should also think of the possible medical complications it might bring. Do not expect someone to accept the condition right away and give them the luxury of time to come to terms with it.
Finding a supportive partner is not impossible. However, couples must ensure that proper preventative measures will be observed to have a more enjoyable relationship. Practicing safe sex is always a must. Make sure to use proper protections such as condom and dental dams when having intercourse. Taking antiviral medications can also reduce the risk of transmission and is strongly advised. Getting regular STI/STD tests are also needed to properly monitor each other’s status. Doctors can give proper medications and advice on how to minimize the risks of transmission.
MP is an STD dating website for people who have a similar diagnosis such as herpes, HIV, HPV and hepatitis. They are a growing online community which offers support to people who are experiencing these medical conditions. They help in connecting people and let them find intimacy without the fear of being judged or discriminated.
Users are also able to interact on their user-friendly forums and discussions and can share about their struggles and recovery stories.
One MP member shared, “Sometime in 2010, my fear came to reality when my result came out positive of genital herpes. I called my best friend who happened to be a medical student then and when he came over, our talk was the best thing that happened to me. He explained a number of things about it and this is when it hit me, that I might have had herpes longer than I thought. I remembered the cold sores that I had to deal with growing up. My friend just told me to take it easy because I might have had herpes all my life and now that the condition had a name, nothing had really changed. To this day, my life is still great and the only thing that changed was that I now can protect the people I love.”
Those who are interested in joining the MP’s online dating platform may sign-up on their website at meetpositives.com. Mobile users can also download MP’s app from the Apple Store and Google Play Store to connect with its growing online community.
SOURCE: Press Advantage [Link]
Meet Positive is an alternative to dating and a second chance for positive singles who live with a sexually transmitted disease.
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